The reality of this situation is ppl are gonna pick whichever situation fits their narrative best and that unfortunately will never change.

They blame you for speaking up because they are scared they will lose you. Meanwhile they dont fight for anything at all. Its a sad day a really sad day.

 Heavy Heavy levels of procrastination are the reasons why I have not taken the time to commit to this blog over the last few months I should be ashamed of myself. Anyways. Upon my reflection this morning I tried to gather my thoughts as to what would make a solid day of work and so called life balance. I find myself doubting alot of my actions in the name of pursuing too many goals. 

For example I would like to stabilize my finances so I could have to the freedom to work in peace. Does that even really make sense? How do I stabilize my finances without working like a mad man. For one I guess I can save but the powers that be the SMARTER ppl say that saving can be a waste of time. So I have been working out in my head how to use my creativity. Songwriting production and what not to my advantage. 

I can make beats I can write songs I can sing so I can create songs. I have ideas and I can network. I need to get to work. In a recent conversation with my fellow creatives there is always this sense that I am being judged by who I choose to create with and what come out of it. It left me feeling very odd and uncomfortable. Call it the introvert in me but it felt nuts. 

I am very happy with my output though, I am very happy that without having to move mountains I have had the opportunity to release new music and new visuals without too much STRESS. Maybe to much criticism but that might just be me imposter syndroming myself out of the game. The mind is a very difficult thing to trust if its not in the right frame. 

Nevertheless I think we just gotta keep trucking we just gotta keep pushing and seeking out place in the world. be grateful for family good friends great convo and life. Alot of things are happening and developing and I am grateful for that. I know for a fact that I need to take better care of my self to feel alot better about who I am as a person and thats taking alot of work but Im doing the work and that is very very very important.

Hopefully I can keep this up I think its important to get in as many words as I can get in steps and keep pressing forward. 

God bless ya

Dupes