weak plans applied with definiteness of purpose suceed over sound plans that are not definitly applied understand the difference between temporary defeat and permanent failure time is the enemy of immorality and injustice

Dec 5 2020 6:54am

im really not sure how 3 days go by and I dont take the time to just spend a few minutes writing down my thoughts LIKE what exactly was I doing. I cant even wrap my head around what i was even doing at the time right now I m back from an airport run and listening to Daniel Ek and Tim Ferriss. I used to spend SOOOOOO much time listening to TIM and other podcasts that kept my mind sharp and had be consistentl chasing greatness. Im not sure what happened in the COVID months but My GOD if i dont feel like I didnt do am NOT doing HAVE NOT DONE enough well these are all understatements. I feel like ive lost trust in others and in myself I feel like ive lost patience for sure with others and myself and maybe I should have listened to the ALCHEMIST more and zone in and stay on point. I was thinking today that and this is totally random that its NOT AN EMPTY calorie if you make it for yourself and AND if you had fun making it. HOW DOES THAT ONE GRAB YOU? Sometimes I get really caught up about WHY we create like what am I doing what am I leaving behind. where does this go from here? But I think that should kinda make it easier to create but it actually makes it harder to BE HONEST. I wonder HOW Im gonna get over that HUMP and change that. Some things u just kinda DO YOU OPEN UP and YOU BREATHE and YOU LET IT GO YOU NEVER REALLY think about it. YOU JUST do it Im struggle with my insecurities in a HUGE way. lets see how I navigate that this week. I have a tremendous about of reading to do and I have ALOT of growth that is still yet undone as I said lets see how that all grows out.

Dec 2 8:38am

im supposed to do these first thing in the morning. still failing at that but hey at least im committing to do them once a day. waking up at 5am has been working save from the fact that i go right back to sleep for like an hour. Im not feeling this daylight saving thing in 2020. when i was working out side more and my son actually went to school it was a lil easier but its tough to be honest. Self discipline is something I have but it varies and I usually use blame as a scape goat so like if I dont have someone rocking with me on my goals my goals fall apart. its a weird thing to come to terms with seeing as how Im a LONER. I get more done when im working solo but i miss the company. I dont miss the distractions but I do miss the comfirmation of hey this sounds dope or you should try this instead. that being said i guess my struggle is staying consitent with the faith that what im actually working on is gonna make an impact. and right now that impact has to CONTRIBUTE to my finances. I wrote and article for the boston compass based on the grant it was great to get my monies for that. It kinda made me feel like WOW ok so you are a writer that gets paid... interesting. Its very similar to when I got my first placement it was like damn son u can actually do this. trust me it took years but that feeling was GREAT!!!!!!!! i gotta hold on to that. Performing to crowds that LOVE and ADORE the music. EPIC as well. Anyways Im doing this in the middle of a mixing sessions but I needed to express this. Thanks to Brian Koppelman for helping me get thru A LOT of insecurities like my fear of certain supplements and thinking I can just power thru LIFE without the right type of energy.

Justice 4 All - Dupes (Prod. R Louie x Dupes)

Stream Audio HERE

Dec 1 1:00pm

Another Month another Rent Payment or Mortgage Payment Im supposed to do this in the AM but I get caught up in the my ego and myself. Try to find out whats going on in the world rather than whats going with me. I really got work on changing that. Nevertheless whats done is done and crying over spilt milk is NOT good for anyone at all. All in all its been a decent morning I was able to put in some new work and create some new music that is always a blessing and makes me feel whole. Im very happy to have done that. I could have been more focused so better luck next time. Lonelyis the new normal iolation is the new normal keep to yourself be you and thrive as best you can. Yesterday I started reading more lets see I can keep it up and Lets see how well that whole works. I still look and wait to hear how the POWERS that be are gonna take care of it's ppl. Its very important stuff. I look forward to working on music and seeing more success in the near future I genuinely do. Im gonna keep writing keep pressing forward and make sure I do my part to contribute to my sucess and those around me.